I should be better by now.
I should be settled
Into my new normal,
A routine that no longer
Includes you.
I should have moved on
At least a little,
Taking steps toward healthy.
I should be beyond
Denial, anger, bargaining
And well on my way
To acceptance.
But in grief
There is no should.
Only is
Or isn't
Can't ... for now.
There are no deadline or timelines.
No finish line.
One day, there will be
May, will, shall.
Acceptance.
Today, I simply take the next step
And move along as best I can.
You see, the thing is
I didn't ask for this
Fresh start.
I was comfortable.
Really.
I had all I wanted.
I had enough.
But now I'm here.
Way out here.
And I miss everything,
Everyone,
I left behind.
I'll never have that again.
I know.
You had so much --
Home,
friends
But you needed more --
Me.
You were comfortable
But I needed you to be strong.
And I love you
Enough to move you
Anywhere
So you'll draw closer to Me.
Depend on me.
Let me be all you need,
And you'll have more than enough.
